We’re back for another episode of our ‘spin off show’ as we provide you a full recap of this weeks episode of The Amazing Race Australia season 3 including full written analysis and our weekly podcast episode with Ben and the Ozlets giving you their unique take on all things to do with the Australia vs New Zealand themed season!
Ben and the Ozlets (or ARzlets as they are sometimes referred for this episode) sit down to discuss their thoughts on the episode and go over their predictions from early in the season but also what they think will happen next week and who is in the box seat to win!
Each week we will also bring you a full written review of the episode from the mind of ozlet Alex Morella! Over to you Alex:
Ok it’s that time of the week again! Time for The Amazing Race!
Minor frustration as Channel 7 and Channel 9 have put Big Brother and The Amazing Race at the same time!!! Thank god for recordings!
Previously on…The Amazing Race: The racers kept racing through Russia after no rest at the pit stop…Nurse Boys came out on top…Hulk Puppy proposed to Smiley Sally, and the shittest twist ever, the Salvage Pass, saw Nurse Boys eliminated Second Best Mates…still spewing about that!
So where do we sit?
#1 – Nurse Boys/Team Jesus (Nurse Daniel & Nurse Ryan)
#2 – Team Vanilla (Bloody Jarrod & Sour Ash)
#3 – Mr & Mrs Hulk Puppy (Hulk Puppy & Smiley Sally)
#4 – Team ANZAC (Cat & Jesse)
#5 – Purple MILFs (Carla & Hereni)
Let’s get racing!
So…Nurse Boys get a 1 hour head start…it better be worthwhile!
Fly to Lisbon, Portugal, and travel to the Belem Tower
Portugal’s cool…I can definitely live with that!
Grant in the snow is an awesome sight (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Nurse Boys think there’s a different vibe without the Second Best Mates around…so much so that they’re now strategising! What happened to it being all about the experience boys! Liars! They point out an alliance at this point would help…except if they haven’t noticed…they’ve been in one since episode 2…
Apparently teams are more optimistic now…because they all know they couldn’t beat Second Best Mates…
Portugal is a great time to bro job each other (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Team Vanilla are off second…but on a bit of a criticism here…they took off at 10:14am…yet the boys WITH A 1 HOUR HEAD START…took off at 9:49am…that…doesn’t make any sense whatsoever….i hope that’s just an editing thing and not cheating by the producers…seriously! They make a fuss about getting the one hour head start…and then there’s a 25 minute difference…that doesn’t work!!!!
So…Team Vanilla tells us they both have strong heads and can struggle to keep it together sometimes…that’s ominous! They have a bicker over nothing at a taxi
Hulk Puppies (now happily engaged!) are off next! Smiley Sally realises marriage comes after engagement…good start! She knows what she signed up for…with Hulk Puppy’s help! It is extra motivation to win…so…more people should get engaged on the race in that case! Why haven’t the Nurse Boys done that yet! I know Team Lannister would’ve got into the spirit! Hulk Puppies also think Portugal is in South America…close…but no cigar!
We get a bit of good old Aussie ignorance, with Bloody Jarrod calling bloody Russia a bit like bloody Collingwood but bloody older, before Smiley Sally continues to go on about South America, and Bloody Jarrod and Sour Ash mention they love Nandos…
Just to clarify Sally, Portugal is in Europe. Ok? (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Team ANZAC are off fourth, around 2 hours after the Aussie sides, with the Purple MILFs only 10 minutes behind them. Jesse actually gives an accurate fact the Cristiano Ronaldo does in fact play for Portugal! Points to the ANZACs!
Team ANZAC say they have to stop selling themselves as the underdogs to themselves…they have to believe they can win! You can guys!
Purple MILFs feel like they’re a threat, but are keen to help out Team ANZAC as much as possible!
At the internet café, Hulk Puppies come to the realisation that Portugal is in Europe…and try to play it down…yeah…a little embarrassing guys…but I’m sure the Americans would’ve made the same mistakes…not the Kiwis though…
See look! Europe! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
All teams end up on the same flight…well that was a fucking worthwhile Salvage Pass then…no wonder no one took off on time…bloody hell
So all teams fly to Lisbon…it takes ages…and they arrive at night
The footrace is on from the airport!
Nurse Boys get the jump start, along with Hulk Puppies, and they get to the tower first and get their next clue
Learn & Perform a Fado Duet, with the help of a mp3 player, and sing the song in Portuguese
The Portuguese Simon Cowell (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Jeez that’s rough! Tough challenge! At least it’s just signing! I thought they were going to play the instrument!
Team ANZAC are excited…Jesse’s singing skills can finally come out!
Team Vanilla have gone to the wrong place, so are going to be at the back of the pack at the start of this leg! Bloody hell it’s not all good Sour Ash! Team Vanilla point out they suck with taxis, maybe if they tried to not speak in really thick Aussie accents and used more…global or local techniques they might actually be more lucky…I’m a believer that you can always do more to make it as easy as possible for the driver once you get to another nation…like going to an internet café and translating the clue into Portuguese…not like you’ve been flying for nearly 2 days…
Cue lots of bad signing…except Jesse…and especially bloody Jarrod
Still better than most contestants on The X Factor (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Purple MILFs think they suck at it but want to just try straight up…Hereni especially struggles…Jesse isn’t impressed…and neither is the judge
Team Vanilla also go for an early crack at it…and bloody Jarrod is bloody woeful! They stop him short and send Team Vanilla back, while the other teams try to keep straight faces…Sour Ash says it sounded like an Aussie bogan trying to sing Portuguese…probably because it was…
Hulk Puppies are up next…Smiley Sally starts out ok, Hulk Puppy struggles though…maybe him and Bloody Jarrod can do a duet! Now that would be something!
Team Vanilla try again! Bloody Jarrod is still bloody terrible…but Team ANZAC praise his commitment…they don’t quite get it!
Cat and Jesse go next…and after working really hard on Cat’s part…Jesse kind of forgets his part! Oh dear!
Somebody is in love! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Nurse Boys are up for their first try…they’ve actually spent a while practising this! And they nail it! Bloody Jarrod calls it the worst bloody singing he’s ever bloody heard…clearly he didn’t hear himself…but it was not bad! And the Nurse Boys are off!
Proceed to the tram stop near Sant’Anna, and ride the historic tram to Largo Das Portas Do Sol
I’m assuming this is a thing for the next morning…
Cue a painful singing montage of Hulk Puppies, Purple MILFs and Team Vanilla, who all sound terrible, but get the clue! Leaving just Team ANZAC at the back!
Where’s Ricky Martin to give them a hug? (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Team ANZAC are still struggling! Poor Jesse! This is his thing! And he just can’t get it! Cue dramatic ad break!
Back from the break…and it seems like there was almost no problem for Jesse! He gets it next time! But they are in last place!
As predicted…everyone turned up to find the tram stop closed…so…we all wait until the next morning!
So everyone takes the tram and gets up to the lookout!
Screw the detour, look at that jumper and hair! Go Grant! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
A detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons, in this detour, teams must choose between
Wet: Teams must count the number of Yellow Umbrellas suspended above them amongst a lot of umbrellas
Dry: Teams must collect a washing basket and search a washing line for a piece of clothing marked with the lady’s name who they got the basket off
Everyone chooses Wet cos it sounds easier…then they all see the umbrellas!
Who knew stealing a Portuguese ladies washing basket was a bad thing (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
It’s a bit daunting…and as Jesse is colour blind…it’s a bit interesting…and looks more challenging than everything thought!
Nurse Boys team up with Hulk Puppies, while the two Kiwi sides also look to work together, while Team Vanilla see this as a good opportunity to switch to the other task and try and get ahead
So a mini Aussie vs Kiwi battle is on!
The Aussie guesses are wrong…and they are now working together…
The Kiwi guesses are wrong too…and Team Vanilla look to be struggling too
Nurse Boys get it! It’s 297! Hulk Puppies get it too! And are off to the next location
Just so you know the number (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Drive your marked car to Fisherman’s Beach, and search for your next clue!
Purple MILFs sneakily ask for the number, but Hulk Puppies ignore them, and decide not to tell the kiwi sides…
Team Vanilla are struggling! They can’t even find any names!
Things are bloody hard in Portugal (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Nurse Boys and Hulk Puppies are at their cars, excited by their rides, and then pay a taxi to drive in front of them so they can follow to the beach…fool proof plan…
Then it kind of comes to a head for Team Vanilla…Bloody Jarrod wants to change…but Sour Ash is unhappy she doesn’t get a say in anything…to which Bloody Jarrod says ‘are you bloody kidding? You’ve pretty much bloody controlled everything!’ Eventually they decide to move…to the displeasure of both of them…Sour Ash says she can’t get the blame if they move as it’s Bloody Jarrod’s call
Oops (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
The Kiwis still can’t get the numbers right…but they’re getting closer!
Team ANZAC get it! And let Purple MILFs know so they can both get out of there…and then are incredibly excited by the Sports cars! I would be too! They look great!
Team Vanilla are back at the umbrella counting…and count every…single…umbrella! Oh dear!
Winning! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
The Aussie’s are happily following the taxi driver…it’s all going beautifully for them! Except for Team Vanilla…who are still doing the wrong thing…They get out to check…and find out they’re going to the wrong place! But now apparently they’re going the right way!
Team Vanilla are still providing hilarity at the detour where they still have no clue what they’re doing! And even the locals are making fun of them now! How brilliant! Bloody Portuguese!
Bloody Portugal (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
After all this…the Kiwis arrive first at the roadblock!
A roadblock is a task that only one team member can perform…
Who’s a good catch?
Team member must source a variety of seafood items, transport them to a local restaurant…and eat some fish stew to get their next clue
Hereni for the Purple MILFs is on it…and not thrilled…
Mmmmm looks good (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Team ANZAC arrive and cat is on the job! The Kiwis still don’t know where the Aussies are…and the Aussies don’t seem to know where they are too…Oh dear…they’ve fallen a long way behind! The Nurse Boys are now spewing they left it all with Smiley Sally! Are their game faces coming out!
Team Vanilla are still doing the challenge wrong…and finally re-read the clue…which says count all the yellow umbrellas! Bloody hell Team Vanilla!
Cut to ads for The Big Adventure…which kind of sounds like a combination of The Amazing Race and Survivor…
Back from the ad breaks…and Team Vanilla are still all over the shop…they’re both headstrong…and it’s so stubborn and just falling apart…oh dear! Bloody Hell! Shit Happens Sour Ash!
Bloody hell (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
At the Roadblock…Hereni is stuffing things in her top…while Cat is using her top to get the job done!
The Aussies finally turn up! And Hulk Puppy and Nurse Ryan are on the job!
Team Vanilla are still absolutely stuffed at the challenge…back to the Washing they go!
Hereni recruits some local help on the roadblock…it’s quite amusing! Hulk Puppy gets directions…and Nurse Ryan races pass Cat!
Team Vanilla ask the locals for help…and somehow a local gives them the right answer…so the foreigners come all good for Team Vanilla eventually!
Hereni gets to the Restaurant…and after getting everything weighed…it’s 100 grams short! Oh the cruel fate! Hereni has to go back and get another one!
No Soup For You (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Everyone finds the carrying hard…but the two Aussie sides get to the Restaurant….Hulk Puppy’s is fine…but Nurse Ryan’s is not! He has to go back! 100 grams off again! Cat arrives and is now worried her Octopus won’t be big enough either!
Hulk Puppy sits down for a meal…which seems a bit challenging…
Hereni gets her last Octopus and just legs it! As does Ryan
At the restaurant…Cat has enough Octopus…she’s delighted! She gets to sit down for a meal! Hereni joins her for a meal!
Isn’t it nice to enjoy a nice family meal from time to time (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Hulk Puppy smashes his down…as does Hereni…while Cat is more…enjoying the meal…much so that Nurse Ryan eats and passes Cat too! She’s enjoying it a bit too much…or not at all!
So Hulk Puppies are in the lead as they get their final clue…the race to the pit stop is on
Proceed to the Pit Stop, Pena Palace, a national monument of Portugal. The last team to check in may be eliminated
It’s tight between Nurse Boys, Hulk Puppies and Purple MILFs, no one is following Hulk Puppies…so the Purple MILFs and Nurse Boys went their own way…the Nurse Boys pass the MILFs, while at the Detour, Cat ditches her jumper in a bin…it smelt pretty bad!
Team Vanilla arrive at the roadblock…and Bloody Jarrod is not bloody thrilled for doing this roadblock…he’s ready to get eliminated smelling like Octopus…and his fish are flopping on the floor a lot!
Cut to ads for Dancing with the Stars…I’m half looking forward to that!
Who looks more ridiculous? (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
Back to Bloody Jarrod flopping bloody fish everywhere! What a bloody awful day!
Back in the race for first, it’s a race between two, but Hulk Puppies are also very lost
Grant is there in a…creative sweater…and…it’s the Nurse Boys who get there first!
OMG BESTIES! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
As the winners of this leg, the boys win two business flights with Virgin Australia to Abu Dhabi! Good prize again!
The Purple MILFs arrive as team number 2!
Back at the Roadblock…bloody Jarrod gets to the restaurant and forgets he has to wait for an exclusive meal! Bloody seafood!
Any bloody tables left? (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
In the race to the pit stop between Team ANZAC and Hulk Puppies…Hulk Puppy needs to stop and answer nature’s call again! It always comes at the worst time!
As a result…Team ANZAC are team number 3! They’re just gradually getting up the leader board! While Hulk Puppies check in as team number 4! Which is a relief for them given how many directions they have stuffed up today!
That leaves Team Vanilla as the last team…..they’re hoping for a non-elimination…and they make it to Grant…hoping for the best…Grant tells them they are the last team to arrive….BUT WAIT A MINUTE!
Bloody hell… (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
IT’S A BLOODY NON-ELIMINATION LEG! BLOODY BRILLIANT FOR TEAM VANILLA!
…BLOODY YAY! (Photo courtesy of Channel 7)
They will have a speed bump to complete next leg…but given how their day has been…they’ll be bloody thrilled for that!
So we’re still at 5 teams!
#1 Nurse Boys – Followed other teams…didn’t work that well for them…but when they do their own thing they are the best team! So they just have to do more of that!
#2 Purple MILFs – Just didn’t do anything wrong…and that’s what they needed to do! Are still slow getting away from a lot of challenges but they’re not messing it up!
#3 Team ANZAC – Everyone’s favourites! They do good things…but struggle to just finish the whole challenge normally…hopefully they’ll be able to keep their climb up the ladder going!
#4 Hulk Puppies – The best and worst team…very strong at challenges…awful at directions and timing toilet breaks! If they can get it all together they’re a chance…but they just haven’t dominated any legs yet!
#5 Team Vanilla – A long way behind…with a speed bump to come…but on their day they can fly up the leader board so…don’t bloody count them out!
Leg Assessment: Portugal provided a nice sunny backdrop! And overall a challenging leg for all teams! The singing added a nice extra challenge…even if doing it at 10pm was pretty pointless with the next morning needing to be waited for.
Detour Assessment: I saw Grant introduce these, and thought it would be a weak, pathetic one…but it turned out to be frustrating, challenging, and really entertaining!
Roadblock Assessment: Another task that seemed simple…but was difficult physically and it was easy to slip up! Teams passed comfortably so that’s what you want in a good roadblock!
Overall a good episode, although without the Second Best Mates it’s odd…Non-Elimination legs generally suck, and when the producer’s favourite team draws it you can’t help but think of favouritism but it was about time for one so…let’s just hope they don’t all end up on the same flight the whole time! I love the US one because everyone takes different routes to get to places…that makes it more challenging…although I guess it discounts the impact of the challenges too…
In any case…it was Amazing Racing! See you on the Planes!
This week was a fairly fun episode, and actually quite a funny episode. The singing in Portugal was great (not to mention Sally and her failure at Geography), the fish challenge was great and the umbrella challenge was great with Ashleigh and Jarrod providing some fantastic moments. I was actually surprised at what a fun episode it was given my two boys (*sniff*) went last week so I found myself entertained which was good! A non-elimination leg was due so we had one, but that also means now that they’re going to have to cover a lot of countries in the last few weeks and that we’re also very close to the end! I think the Jesus pair are in the hot seat to win, and I think their edit suggests it’s in the bag. I hope I’m wrong! I also can’t not bring up the fact that this weeks episode was 18 MINUTES LATE! SHAME CHANNEL 7! SHAME! Bring on next week!
Tune in next week for our episode 8 recap! Let us know your thoughts on the episode by commenting below!
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